Saturday, August 30, 2008

I told her....

to go pick out some jammies for bed. When I went into her bedroom, this is what I saw!



Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Final Final Childcare update

Well, it's really easy to second guess and wonder if you did the right thing. "Were we being too soft?" "Were we reading in more than was actually there?" I was glad for one final visit because I now have no residual doubts.

So, we've had Cady out of childcare for over a week now and she still talks about not going back. I had to go in there today to pick up her stuff that we left. Cady was totally fine going in. She was fine talking with the receptionists. We went into the wrong room the first time. The teacher gave Cady some glue and asked if she wanted to play with the kids. She was fine. I realized we were in the wrong room, duh (I was confused because it was the teacher they TOLD me Cady would have when we toured). Then we went to the right room. Nobody was in the room. We started looking around for her stuff. She was fine. The kids came in. She was fine. One of the co-teachers came in and talked to Cady, she was fine. Her teacher came in and Cady nearly lost her mind when she saw her. Huge tears, trying to climb through me, asking me to get her out of there. Her anxiety went THROUGH THE ROOF! I can say that I have NEVER seen her have a reaction like that to a person. Instead of giving Cady space, she kept coming at her trying to hug her and talk to her which sent her into an even worse space. Anyhow, I'm glad we decided what we did. It doesn't look like something she would have moved past.

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Ultrasound results

I had my third OB/GYN appointment yesterday and we discussed at length all of the options in front of me for genetics testing. I can get an amniocentesis, or CVS, or Sequential Screening. There's all kinds of fun stuff which I wish I didn't have to think about.
Anyhow, the bonus of being a "mature mom" (that's the label on my medical chart) is that I get an extra ultrasound between my 8 week and 20 week ultrasound. The ultrasound is part of a sequential screening that measures the nuchal fold (base of the neck) which is a big indicator for Down's as well as other measurements for physical abnormalities. Thought I'd share the results with you.

Okay. Not really the results. I have to wait a month till all the blood screenings are done. And since I'm only 12 1/2 weeks so it's too early for them to tell me the gender with any kind of accuracy. But here's Cady interpretation.

"It's a baby in there!"

"Get it out mommy. Open your stomach!"

"It's dancing mommy! The baby likes to dance"

"Look mommy, the baby is dancing in the tunnel!"

On the way to the appointment Cady announced the she wanted them to take a picture of the baby in her belly too. I didn't think too much of it beyond that but she had a plan and she followed through. After I got up from the table, Cady squeezed in next to me (I thought to sit) but she immediately layed down, pulled up her shirt and asked to have her baby checked. I pretended to take pictures of her belly. The ultrasound tech jumped in and started doing an ultrasound of her belly and showing her her liver and her heart and she let her hear her heart amplified. Then she took a still picture of her liver and heart for her to take home. Initially I was dreading taking Cady with me. She's notorious for pushing the limits at the Dr.'s office, but she did really well and what a great experience!

Oh...the baby is very active. Like so active I had to ask if it was "normal". The baby(Barley, according to Penny) would not stay still long enough for her to do measuements. It was really a challenge. It bounced around a lot and did little flips. Heaven help us if we have another one with as much energy as Cady.

Monday, August 25, 2008

Taking out the eyes!

Not sure if I blogged about this before. If so, bare with me. Rob and I try to be really careful about what we watch on TV while Cady is awake. TLC and The Food Network is about as hardcore as it gets. So, about a month ago I flip on TLC and it just happens to be this scene where a blind kid is taking his glass eyeballs out and putting them away for the night. Cady of course was in absolute awe and immediately announced that she too would like to take out her eyeballs. This became a constant battle for quite some time. Cady insisting that she wanted her eyes out and us trying to share logic as to why it is not a good idea to take our your eyeballs. It got to the point where I was a little nervous even to put her down for a nap or bedtime because I had this vision of her taking her eyes out...she is a pretty persistent kid.
Well, just when we thought it would never end, it did.
Until...
Okay, who has seen that M&M commercial with the two talking M&M's. The one M&M guy pulls an M&M out of the pack. The other M&M guy says that he can see a resemblance. The first M&M guy doesn't see it. SOOOOOO, the second M&M guy pops the first M&M guys eyes off of his head and attaches them to the M&M. Greeeaaaaaaat!
Who do you think a two year old is going to believe now? Mom and Dad who have spent a month convincing her that she can't remove her eyes AFTER SHE HAS ALREADY SEEN IT HAPPEN and has now seen it happen for the SECOND time by a very believable and trustworthy M&M guy?
Yup. Back to the logic battles.

Saturday, August 23, 2008

Gymnastics!

Cady started gymnastics class this morning. Talk about a fish in water, she loved it!! She was able do everything all the other kids were able to do even though they've been at it for a while (we dropped into the middle of a session). The morning was full of everything that she loves the most in the world...running, jumping, climbing and rolling. Her instructors are GREAT and if Rob and I would deviate from anything that she thought we were supposed to be doing she would remind us of what her teachers wanted. We didn't get pictures. Heck, on a Saturday morning it's amazing that we can even get ourselves somewhere on time let along grab the camera...but maybe next time.

Preschool Drop-out!

This is a long update about Cady's "school."
After her "okay" day on Friday, Cady spent nearly the entire weekend talking about how she did not want to go back to school. It started to make me question, "how do you know what is considered 'normal' difficulty adjusting versus when there are genuine concerns.
On Wednesday (her first day) she told me in the bedroom when I asked about her teacher, "black lady mean". I didn't think too much of it, but definitely took note. There is a teacher (supposedly not HER teacher) who is African-American that was in her room that day when I picked her up, but we've never labeled people by black or white so it was surprising to even hear her reference someone as a black lady.

Anyhow, her ramblings about not wanting to go back to school, along with the thought that Cady has never had difficulty adjusting to new people or settings, along with the fact that she never talks about her teacher (she talks about ALL adults that she meets non-stop), along with the fact that there were things we were told by the center that were already proving to be not true (we'll only start potty training if you tell us she's ready, making it look as though she was with a class of 6 when she was in a class of 12 when we picked her up, etc..)makes it really hard to push her to get through the adjustment period if we are not 100% certain certain ourselves that things are as they should be. Even if there was nothing fundamentally wrong with the program, Cady just seems a bit overwhelmed by the institutional setting...and she's only two so there's nothing wrong with that!

SO, based on those concerns and many conversations with Rob, we decided to look into a home-based daycare in our neighborhood. The woman who runs it is a licensed educator with an endorsement in Early Childhood Education. She has taught Kindergarten the past four years. The smaller setting (max of 5 kids) and being in someone's home all sounded like something that might work better for Cady. I had previously attended an open-house at her house to learn about the program because you never know when you need a back-up. So, we paid a 200.00 non-refundable deposit and she'll be starting on September 3rd. Naturally, in true Paula style I started second-guessing myself as soon as she was accepted. Should we ride it out at the other place? Maybe she will adjust. Why put her through a new adjustment? And the fact is that we would have to have her there two more weeks anyhow while waiting for the new place to open.

Those thoughts evaporated quickly when Rob called me on Wednesday morning. When Cady woke up this morning and saw that I wasn't at home she started SCREAMING and CRYING about not going to school. I was with students so I only got messages with Rob calling and saying, "I don't know what to do P, she is totally freaking out, I''ve never seen her like this." He said he couldn't console her and he could not get her into the car at all.

I called back and talked to Cady who informed me that "I cry mommy. I was freaking out!" LOL She then told me, "mamma, the teacher scary, I no go to school." Holy crap if my heart wasn't about ready to explode knowing that she was that upset about it and to hear her make yet another negative statement about the teacher. When toddlers have themes in their discussions it's something to listen to. Rob decided to call the school and stay home with her. We have to suck it up as far as forfeiting the days that we already paid for over the next two weeks, not to mention find someone to help us out over the next two weeks. I think it was a good decision though. Cady's a perceptive little thing and picks up on a lot of underlying stuff. I think we'd be fools to not listen to that!

Sunday, August 17, 2008

Daycare, day 2

I went in to work a little later on Friday because we had meetings. I figured I'd take Cady to school and maybe she'd do better since it's a big switch to not see me at all in the morning and then spend the day at school. Bad idea! She sobbed the entire way in the car, "No school mommy! I don't want to go to school mommy!". When we got there, "Crayon" the daycare dog was there which was such a relief because Cady brightened up when she saw him. But then I walked her into the room and she instantly erupted into tears. HUGE tears were rolling down her face and she was crying, "no mommy!" Her teacher took her from me. I tried to be nonchalant although I was dying inside. I told her that I loved her and I'd see her at 4. As I walked down the hall, near tears, I could hear her crying for me. I held the tears until I opened the door and then I couldn't hold them anymore. I called Rob who convinced me that we were not going to traumatize her, ruin or destroy her life by having her in child care two days a week. In my head I know that and I know it'll take some adjustment time, but man does this suck!
Rob ended up working from home and had to leave early because of a showing so he was able to pick her up early. He took her to McDonalds and she talked his ear off while they had ice cream together. He said she was in an awesome mood! Her daily report said she had a good day (in between intermitten tears and asking for mom and dad). She's always been self-conscious about singing out loud but now that she's in school she belts it out. I can tell which songs they sung that day by listening to her singing around the house. I think she likes it. I think the separation piece and missing us is a separate issue. I'm hopeful that she won't always cry when she is there. The other positive is that on her reports it shows that she tries to go potty everytime they ask. That's more than she does for us. I think seeing the other kids get stickers when they go is really motivating for her.
I do have a lingering concern that nap time seems to be so stressful for her. We are told that everything is going just fine, but she gets really upset when she talks about having to take a nap. She said she was in trouble for jumping. I can believe that and I know there will be adjustment, but the discrepancy in what we are told versus how it really is is something we'll need to ask about.

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

First Day Of "School"

I wish it had gone a little better but I suppose it could have been worse. Cady has been talking about school for weeks now and the day finally came. I had to be at work at 7 so Rob let her sleep in and took her before he went to work. He said the transition went well. They were having breakfast, she sat down and started eating, he kissed her goodbye and that was it.

When I went to her room to pick her up this afternoon, she and about 10 other toddlers were all sitting really nicely at tables and chairs singing "Where is Thumbkin" but I could totally tell from her eyes that she had been crying quite a bit. The lady that took me to the room said, "Does she call you sweetie mommy?" I said, "Yeah" and she said, "She has been asking for sweetie mommy all day." When Cady saw me she showed no emotion. She got up and walked over to me. The teacher came over and said that she had a rough morning. That she was weepy all morning and kept asking for "my sweetie girl mommy". She asked if she had a big sister because Cady also kept telling her and anyone who would listen about her big sister. I told them that Cady is going to be a big sister and it's what she always talks about. Anyhow, they said she napped (surprise!) and had a better afternoon, but she has been an emotional, inconsolable mess ever since I picked her up. It gets better, right??

Trip to Wisconsin

We were unable to go to Maine this year, but the week before I returned to work we decided that a drive up to Wisconsin would be affordable and quick. It ended up being about 15 hours each way. That's a lot of driving with a two year old but Cady did pretty darned well considering. If you keep her loaded up on snacks, buy a pack of dum-dums and give her one every time you stop for gas, point out every "glitter pole" (flashing tower), cow, yellow car, train and motorcycle that passes and play The Wiggles ad nauseum, it keeps her happy.
We had two sets of directions. One from Google and one from Mapquest and can you believe they were both wrong? They led us the right way until you actually get into farm country. Then we ended up on County Road I out with the Amish buggies on a long path to nowhere with both cell phones dead...but we worked our way out of the mess and made it to Grappas house!
The FIRST thing Cady had to do was feed the horses. They'll probably have diarrhea now for a week considering how many green apples they got from Cady that weekend, but it was probably one of her favorite things. Oh, that and getting Chocolate Milk and Ice Cream ALL THE TIME (thanks Dad!), swimming in Grappas jacuzzi tub, doing acrobatics with Grappa, watering the lawn with Gramma Diane and just getting spoiled in general. I'm really glad she had that opportunity! It was a short but fun trip. One of the HUGE bonuses of driving to Wisconsin is going to the cheese shop and stocking up on cheese so we can eat ourselves silly when we get home (which we did!)
The trip back was a little rough on all of us. There hadn't been enough time and distance between the last 15 hour drive before we had to do it all over again. We were all on the grouchy side on the drive home. The only thing that kept Cady going on the first day return trip home was the promise of a pool. And we drove everywhere looking for a hotel with a pool. Paid too much. She swam for 20 minutes before the clouds moved in and the wind started blowing and put an end to swimming. Blah!
We made it home safely last night and I started back to work this morning and Cady started her first day of school today as well. That's another blog.
Riding the tractor with Grappa

Calling the horses

I love her little knock-knees

Playing at the park

Petting horses with Grappa

Monday, August 4, 2008

I must be the most psycho pregnant woman on the planet!

I can't eat normal anymore. Every day is about a craving. And really, I'm not like this in "real life!" I appreciate food, but I'm flexible and I certainly don't get cravings beyond, "huh, sometime in the next few months we should have lasagna because that sounds good." When I have a craving now I have to have it right then and there and nothing else will do. Here's the problem. Aversions. I have those too! Here's the bigger problem. My aversion is to left-overs...any kind of left-over. Normally I LOVE left-overs. I think things taste better the next day after they have had a chance to meld. And now for the psycho part (we'll just pretend none of that other stuff is psycho). Let's use the example of the gingerbread I was craving. Not just normal gingerbread but cake-like gingerbread. I spent two days looking for THE perfect recipe. I found one. I made a whole 8x12 pan of gingerbread. I had a piece. Craving satisfied. Oh-oh, now we have left-overs. Another day it was tuna-salad. Same thing. Asian Noodles? "Oh Ro-ob! How would you like to finish off enough asian noodles for ten before they go bad in three days?". I asked to Rob make me cheese blintzes (I knew he had the patience to pull it off) because they sounded like something we needed. It took going to three stores to find Farmer's Cheese and several hours that morning of Rob's blood, sweat and tears to put the things together. I have to say that they were delicious but after two I realized that those two blintzes would hold me over for at least a few years. I do have to say that Rob didn't seem to mind eating the other 12! lol. So, as I sit here licking my fingers of Secret Sauce from the Big Mac I just finished...something I haven't had it years because there truly is nothing redeeming about a Big Mac...I felt inspired to share with you all the trials of being pregnant....and perhaps the bigger trial of someone who is married to the pregnant person!

Cady's Imaginary Friend

Cady's real life best friend is Emma. They are a month apart in age. Every week Cady and Emma spend time together because we do a swap with their mom and dad. One week Emma comes over for two hours and another week Cady goes over there for two hours. Well, when Emma is not around in physical form, she is around in spirit. Cady has an imaginary Emma for the times that she can't be with her friend. It first started at the store. Cady said that Emma was sitting in the grocery cart with her. Then it evolved into Emma being at home with us. Sometimes she watches cartoons with us, sometimes she is present at dinner time, she's been known to sleep with Cady at night and she is always present when we grocery shop.

There are spaces in the grocery cart that I can't place things because that is where Emma is at. Sometimes Emma needs to have dinner when we all eat together. We need to kiss Emma goodnight at bedtime and Emma will get her own blanket when we watch tv together. Last week at the store Cady started laughing. Rob and I look at each other as if it ask, "did you do something to make her laugh?" Cady informs us at that point, "Emma farted!!!!! chuckle chuckle" (in her loud voice of course because we are at the meat counter at the store). Niiiiiice.

I'm so glad that Cady is starting "school" next week. She understands that she will be going to a different school than her real friend Emma. To differentiate that in her own mind she tells me that she will be going to the orange school and Emma is going to a purple school. Okay. She is REALLY excited about going to school and can't get there quick enough. The day starts and ends with her asking about going to school. When we did tour the school, the first thing that Cady did when we walked into her new classroom was kicked off her crocs and sat herself at the table with all the other kids. When she started to steal froot loops from a future classmate (who in turn informed her 'we share in this class') I walked over to intervene. It was at that moment that Cady informed that that I could leave, "Mommy, go!" I think she is going to do just fine!

Sunday, August 3, 2008

FYI

The new addition will be referred to as "Olive". We already had a "Rice". Since that name came from the baby book we were reading that said Cady was about the size of a piece of rice at that time, we called her rice. Well, the new baby book says about the size of an Olive. So Olive it is! :)